Filing for Divorce When a Spouse's Location Is Unknown
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Reviewed & verified by A. Jason Velez, Esq.*
Managing Attorney, 1LAW · Last reviewed January 7, 2026
Legal Inquiry
Consumer Legal Issue
My husband and I have been separated for 9 or so years now I don't know how to contact him or where he is is there anyway I can get help with getting a divorce and finding out where he is….
I have not had contact with him but my parents said they heard he was in jail out of state some where.
Attorney Answer
Yes — you can move forward with a Missouri divorce even without knowing exactly where your husband is, and the same diligent-search process the court requires for that also gives you your best options for locating him.
Missouri law (RSMo § 452.305) requires that before a court can grant a dissolution of marriage, one spouse must have been a Missouri resident for the 90 days immediately before filing, at least 30 days must have passed since the petition was filed, and the marriage must be irretrievably broken. None of that depends on being able to locate your husband — you can file once you meet the residency requirement.
Because he can't be served personally, you will generally need the court's permission to use an alternative method, such as service by publication. Missouri courts typically expect you to first document a diligent, good-faith search — the exact court rule isn't cited here, but courts generally want an affidavit describing your efforts before authorizing publication.
What you can do:
1. Confirm you meet the 90-day Missouri residency requirement before filing.
2. Document a diligent search: contact relatives, his former employer, and the postal service for a forwarding address.
3. Since he may be incarcerated out of state, check free resources first — the relevant state's Department of Corrections inmate locator and VINELink — before considering a paid search or private investigator.
4. If you confirm he's held at a specific facility, ask the court about serving him there directly rather than defaulting to publication; if you can't confirm a location, ask the court to approve service by publication based on your documented search.
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Frequently Asked Questions
Can you get divorced if you don't know where your spouse currently lives?
Generally, yes; courts allow divorce filings to proceed even without a spouse's current address, typically through alternative service methods once a diligent search is documented.
What counts as a diligent search for a missing spouse?
This generally includes contacting relatives, former employers, and using postal or public records to attempt to locate the person before requesting alternative service.
What is service by publication?
This is a court-approved method allowing notice of a legal proceeding through a published notice when a party cannot be located through reasonable efforts.
