Do I Have to Let My Son's Father See Him Without a Custody Order in Ohio?
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Reviewed & verified by A. Jason Velez, Esq.*
Managing Attorney, 1LAW · Last reviewed January 1, 2026
Legal Inquiry
Consumer Legal Issue
I have a child outside of marriage. The father keeps threatening me, accusing me of neglecting our son's health. I don't want to send my son to him anymore.
Attorney Answer
In Ohio, when parents were never married, the mother is automatically the sole residential parent and legal custodian of the child unless a court has issued a different order. That means, legally, you are not required to send your son to the father unless there is a court order saying you have to.
This comes from Ohio Revised Code 3109.042, which provides that an unmarried mother is the sole residential parent and legal custodian of her child until a court says otherwise. Unless the father has gone to court and gotten a parenting time or custody order, or he has legally established paternity and requested one, you currently have the legal authority to decide where your son goes and when.
A few things are still important, though. First, the father can go to a juvenile or domestic relations court at any time to establish paternity and ask for parenting time or custody, and once he does, a judge will decide based on your son's best interest, not just on who currently has him. Second, if you deny contact for reasons that are hard to document later, a court may view that less favorably, so it helps to keep records of the specific threats and any real safety concerns. Third, if the father's threats rise to the level of making you believe he will physically harm you or your son, that can be its own legal issue under Ohio's menacing laws, separate from the custody question.
What you can do
1. Keep a written log of the threats, including dates, what was said, and any messages or voicemails. 2. If you believe your son is unsafe with his father, document specific concerns rather than general worry, since courts weigh concrete facts more heavily. 3. If threats continue or escalate, consider whether a civil protection order is appropriate. 4. Talk to a family law attorney now, even before the father files anything, about formally establishing custody and parenting time terms so everyone knows the rules going forward.
This is general legal information, not legal advice, and a local Ohio family law attorney can review your specific situation and help you get a custody order that protects your son and gives you clarity.
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Frequently Asked Questions
Does the father have any legal rights if paternity was never established?
He can pursue rights, but he generally needs to establish paternity first, through an acknowledgment of paternity or a court case, before a court will grant him formal parenting time or custody.
Can the father call the police or children services if I stop letting him see our son?
He can, but without a custody order requiring you to share time with him, simply declining visits is not on its own illegal. What matters most is whether there's evidence of actual neglect or danger to the child.
Should I be the one to file for a custody order first?
It can help to be proactive, since filing first lets you propose the parenting time schedule and get clear terms in writing rather than reacting to whatever the father files later.
