Handling Repeated Contact From an Ex and a New Partner
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Reviewed & verified by A. Jason Velez, Esq.*
Managing Attorney, 1LAW · Last reviewed January 1, 2026
Legal Inquiry
Consumer Legal Issue
The father of my child was verbally abusive and physically abusive for 3 years I been with him but I don’t have much proof of it and since I left him he barely asks to see her and just repeats the same text everyday my question is can I do anything about him repeating the same messages everyday and is there anything I can do weigh his girlfriend of just a week trying to bark orders.
No it’s just a repeated how she doing and telling her he loves her but nothing else it’s the same messages everyday and his girlfriend just thinks she can put her two sense in.
Attorney Answer
Daily, non-threatening texts about your child are not illegal harassment, and a protective order is unlikely on that basis alone — but you have a stronger tool available: a court-ordered parenting plan.
Under Tenn. Code Ann. § 36-6-406, a court setting a parenting plan shall limit a parent's residential time where there is reliable evidence of physical abuse or a pattern of emotional abuse. "Reliable evidence" is broader than the hard proof you may feel you lack — your own testimony, saved messages, and any medical or witness accounts all count. A parenting plan can also set communication rules, such as requiring all contact go through a co-parenting app, which ends the daily-text friction directly. If messages ever turn threatening or the abuse resumes, an order of protection under Tenn. Code Ann. § 36-3-601 et seq. remains available.
On the girlfriend: she has no legal standing in custody or co-parenting decisions, and nothing she says carries any legal force.
What you can do:
1. Save and screenshot every message, with dates — this documents both the pattern of contact and his level of engagement with your child.
2. File for a parenting plan in the appropriate Tennessee court.
3. Raise the history of physical and emotional abuse under § 36-6-406 so the court can factor it into residential time and communication terms.
4. If contact ever turns threatening, seek an order of protection under § 36-3-601 et seq.
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Frequently Asked Questions
Can a parenting plan limit an ex-partner's communication with a child?
Generally yes; a court-ordered parenting plan can set specific rules for how and when parents communicate about a child, including requiring contact through a co-parenting app.
Does a history of abuse affect custody or residential time decisions?
In many states, courts must consider reliable evidence of physical abuse or a pattern of emotional abuse when setting a parenting plan, even without formal proof like police reports.
Does a parent's new partner have any legal say in custody matters?
Generally no; a parent's new partner has no legal standing in custody or parenting decisions.
